Forgetting Him
by rachwieghell
Summary: Set 5 years after season 4. What if Rachel had gotten a false negative at the doctors after her positive home pregnancy test? Will Rachel tell Finn after not seeing him for 5 years? Will they move back towards each other? Mainly Finchel with a bit of Brittana and Klaine.
1. Chapter 1

**My very first fanfic! **

**After Cory's passing I began reading loads of Finchel fanfic and I wanted to try so here it is! Hope you like it! **

**I do not own Glee.**

Buzz…..Buzz…Buzz. ..

Rachel moaned and squashed the pillow over her head in an attempt to try and ignore her alarm.

"MAN HANDS – TURN THAT ALARM OFF!" Rachel heard muffled through her pillow.

She sighed and sat up in bed to turn off her alarm.

Today was just another day but she knew differently. It was his birthday.

Rachel shook her head to try and rid herself of him. Getting up she wrapped her dressing gown around her as she sleepily stumbled into her ensuite. Glancing into the mirror, she began her morning skin ritual.

I wonder if he ever thinks of me, she began to wonder. Stop it Rachel. It's been 5 years; you are an independent woman who needs no-one. You are in the city of your dreams. You are on Broadway; this is what you have always wanted. Well almost she told herself. After only getting the understudy role of Fanny Price during her freshman year at NYADA, Rachel had thrown herself into her studies. That was until Daisy was born. She could still remember the doctor's appointment like yesterday.

**_"What do you mean I'm pregnant – I was in here 2 months ago and YOU told me that it was a false positive on my home pregnancy test and that I was not pregnant!" she had screamed at Dr Burk. _**

**_She could see the doctor turning pink. _**

**_"This can happen Miss Berry when your HCG levels are low, not very own often but it can happen" Dr Burk hesitated. "I am really sorry but you are 12 weeks pregnant." _**

**_She just sat there stunned, unable to speak. 12 weeks. Where was she 12 weeks ago? April, March, February…Rachel gasped. She knew instantly where she was. She knew who the father was. Well, who it could be as there were two possibilities. How could she have been so stupid! _**

Dressing herself she entered into the living space in the flat she shared with Santana. After Kurt and Blaine got engaged, Santana and Rachel had agreed to find their own place to give the couple their own space. After all, they needed the space for the baby growing inside of Rachel anyway and Rachel could not afford a place of her own.

Rachel peered into Daisy's room to see that she was still fast asleep. Dark brown wavy hair was poking out of the pink flowered duvet. Rachel could see the duvet raising and falling slowly and in rhythm to the quiet snoring coming from her daughter. Rachel couldn't quite believe she had a 4 year old daughter.

"Can't quite believe she is so normal, considering you've raised her by yourself man hands" Santana stated as she wandered pass Rachel.

Rachel took a deep breath both annoyed and sadden by what Santana had said. She didn't know who Daisy's father was when she was pregnant. She had tried to speak to the possible fathers but one was too busy with his show to give her the time of day and the other….

She walked over to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee. She hadn't spoken his name in so long. She had willed herself not to think about him after she had visited him at his dorm. He had been busy. Busy with….

Her eyes welled up remembering that day. She hadn't even known who the father was when she was pregnant, but as Daisy got older it was getting harder and harder to deny who it was. It had been easy to lie when Daisy was younger as Daisy was almost the splitting image of her, right down to her nose and small stature. But her eyes.

She had known when Daisy first opened her eyes. They were his. She had never been able to resist those eyes. Talking a sip of the hot coffee Rachel threw herself onto the couch.

"I wish you would stop calling me man hands Santana" Rachel spat.

"Someone is in a mood" Santana spat back.

Rachel glared at Santana. "I thought you were trying to be nicer to people."

"I am – sorry I am just tired. You know I go back to that angry place when I'm tired" Santana spoke as she threw her arms up. "Mini you had me up all night playing with her."

Rachel smiled slightly as she knew that Daisy loved to play dress up and afternoon tea with everyone.

"Thanks again Santana for looking after her. I was almost sure that I was going to be able to go on last night but Julia turned up while I was in makeup. I don't know how she gets away with being so late and moody all the time! It's so unprofessional!" Rachel said frustrated.

Santana shrugged "You'll get your shot; you just need to be patient."

"I have been patient! I have been her understudy for 5 years. 5 years! Every single time I think that I am going to be able to go on – she turns up!" Rachel sighed bitterly. "How am I ever going to be able to prove that it should have been me in the first place if I can't even get on the stage?"

"I know you are frustrated Rach but you just need to wait. She has to slip up sometime" Santana uttered. "At least you have Lady Hummel's wedding to look forward to."

Rachel sighed. Kurt was getting married in a month and she knew she would have to face him. After avoiding Lima and his phone calls for 5 years, she was going to have to see him. There was no possible way out as Kurt wanted her as his bridesmaid and she couldn't say no to Kurt. She had managed to blow him off for a while when it came to anything to do with the rest of the bridal party but she knew it was just a matter of time.

"Imagine the look on Finnocence when he finds out you have a daughter!" Santana exclaimed trying to hold back laughter.

"He isn't going to! It has nothing to do with him! Santana don't you dare!" Rachel growled back.

"Touchy Berry. He will find out you know. Can't believe you haven't spoken to him in like 5 years. It's ridiculous. Fair enough you don't want him to know about Brody's spawn but you guys were crazy about each other!" Santana answered.

Rachel felt her eyes well up as she was reminded of how much he meant to her. She needed to get out and clear her head. She had thought about him too much – it was too painful.

"Something's are better off in the past Santana" Rachel replied quietly. "Would you mind watching Daisy while I go for a run?"

Santana nodded while giving Rachel a knowing look. She understood. It would be the first time Santana would be seeing her ex-girlfriend Brittany as well.

Rachel went and changed into her workout clothes before exiting the flat. She needed some distance. She began sprinting down the stairs and out the door down the block. She needed to get him out of her head, it had been 5 years. It wasn't as if she hadn't tried to go on dates to find someone else but they all seemed to fail for one reason or another. She had given all sorts of reasons. Too clingy. Not committed. Too short. Plain boring. But she knew the real reason.

They weren't him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for your follows and reviews - let me know what you think! **

**I do no own Glee.**

Running usually helped clear Rachel's mind, but not today. In fact, her day just seemed to continue on a downward spiral. Not only could she not get him off her mind – she had gotten sprayed with dirty water from a puddle when a taxi raced past her. Wiping filthy water from her eyes while it continued to run down her face, she cursed to herself, turned around and began the walk home.

That was it, Rachel decided. She needed to sort her personal life out – she needed to try harder to block him out.

As she ran up the stairs she could hear the joyful squeals of Daisy. She could pick out her beautiful giggle anywhere. Smiling to herself, Rachel opened the door and threw her keys on the side table before a bundle of dark auburn hair and bunny pyjamas threw themselves at her. Daisy nuzzled into Rachel's chest and grinned up at her with a chocolate smeared mouth and tousled hair, Rachel's heart melted.

"What have you got around your face Daisy Bell?" Rachel smirked.

"Breakfast!" Daisy exclaimed while she threw her arms around Rachel's neck.

"Since when was chocolate breakfast?" Rachel frowned.

Daisy knowing that her mother did not look impressed just coyly beamed at her and pressed her cheek against her mother's. Rachel stroked Daisy's cheek softly with her hand while she gently kissed her forehead knowing that she couldn't stay mad at her daughter. Walking into the kitchen with Daisy still in her arms, Rachel saw Santana washing dishes as she stared vacantly out of the window, not paying attention to what she was doing. Comprehending that Santana was most likely thinking about Brittany and was not aware that Rachel and Daisy were both in the room, Rachel whispered into Daisy's ear, "I think Auntie San is sad and needs a super Daisy hug."

Daisy nodded and squirmed out of Rachel's arms onto the floor and scampered around the wooden central island that dominated the kitchen, towards Santana.

Wrapping herself around Santana, Daisy spoke softly whilst glancing up at Santana, "Auntie Sanana doesn't be sad."

"You mean do not Daisy Bell" Rachel injected as Santana gradually glazed adoringly down at Daisy, a weak smile spreading across her face. Rachel knew the smile was for Daisy's benefit and Santana must be troubled if she was so quiet.

Feeling Rachel's empathic eyes, Santana glanced up at Rachel. Exchanging a small smile Santana muttered, "I forget sometimes how in love with her I was and how hard it is going to be to see her."

Rachel simply nodded quietly as she could see Santana fighting back tears. It was an extremely rare occasion for Santana to be so open and vulnerable in front of Rachel. A silent solitary tear fell down Santana's cheek forcing her to close her eyes to try and stop anymore falling. Brittany had been Santana's best friend in high school who she had also developed feelings for. Brittany was the one who had helped Santana face her feelings for her and accept that she was gay. Brittany had been her first love. Just like him.

Rachel shook her head. This wasn't about her and she needed to stop making this about her. Rachel didn't know what to tell Santana. She didn't have any words to ease the ache. She was stilling aching herself.

"Sanana needs hugs!" Daisy squealed as she pressed herself tighter to Santana's leg.

A genuine smile spread across Santana's face as Santana turned to Rachel whilst wiping her glistening cheek, "Lady Hummel is on the way over – you still haven't been dress shopping with him yet and he is pis.." Glancing down at Daisy, Santana whispered, "P-I-S-S-E-D."

"Sanana said a bad word mama!" Daisy squealed as she loosen her grip on Santana's bare leg.

"Santana!" Rachel exclaimed as Santana rolled her eyes.

"Berry calm down – don't get your panties in a twist. You better get ready for a mind numbing day of shopping with Hummel," Santana said sarcastically. "Me and my lady Dee Dee here are going to go to Central Park and relax aren't we Dee?"

Daisy grinned and nodded up at Santana before she unlatched herself from Santana and ran over to Rachel with her arms outstretched. Rachel bent down and embraced Daisy tightly. Muttering in Daisy's ear, "You be a good girl for Auntie Santana."

Daisy simply nodded and Rachel loosens her embrace so that she was at eye level with Daisy, "Santana is going to help get you washed up and dressed."

Daisy squealed excitably and planted a sloppy kiss on Rachel's mouth before she ran out of the room. Santana smirked as she passed Rachel to follow Daisy, "Have a lady fabulous day with the other Olsen twin."

Rachel smirked to herself. Santana was as much a part of her family as Daisy. They had grown up together and she and Kurt were the only two people who could playfully insult her. It was a sign of fondness from Santana.

Moving into her bedroom she could hear Santana speaking to Daisy in Daisy's bedroom, "Seriously lady Dee Dee how have you inherited your mother's hideous granny toddler style? How about this?"

Rachel knew that Santana and Kurt were trying to subject Daisy to the same wardrobe invention that they had subjected her to 5 years ago. After washing the dirty water off her face she began brushing her long ombre hair. Rachel wondered how many dresses she would be subjected to and how annoyed Kurt really was. The truth was that she had been avoiding him and neglecting her role as chief bridesmaid. Carole had been very involved in Kurt's decisions and it was awkward. Carole had always treated Rachel like her own daughter and she knew she would be the only person to see through Rachel's lies. She would know that Daisy was his.

Breathing out, staring blankly into her reflection Rachel wondered if it would ever hurt not to remember him.

"RACHEL YOU BETTER BE DRESSED AND READY!"

Rachel recognised the high pitched bark and knew instantly that Kurt was irritated. Swiftly changing her clothes Rachel called out "Two seconds Kurt!"

With one last look in the mirror Rachel swept some eyeliner and mascara over her eyes and grabbed her handbag from her bed and entered the living space staring into and fumbling in her bag.

"Kurt do I need to bring anything?" Rachel muttered as she double checked that she had everything in her bag, fishing in her bag for her cell phone.

"Rachel sweetie you look beautiful."

Rachel snapped her head up in a blind panic. She recognised that motherly tone. She was here. In her flat. With Daisy in the next room.


	3. Chapter 3

**Apologies for taking so long to update. I will try and update again before Monday! **

**As always I love your reviews! **

**I do not own Glee. **

**RIP Cory**

"Carole" Rachel muttered shocked, wide eyed and frozen in place.

She needed to get Carole out of here. Fast.

Carole beamed at Rachel. He had gotten his smile from her Rachel noticed. When he used to half smile at her, his whole face would light up and Rachel couldn't help but stare at him in awe like a weird stalker person. Back to the task at hand Rachel snapped at herself.

"Are you going to give me a hug or just stand there?" Carole smiled at Rachel while she pushed a strand of her golden brown hair from her eyes.

"Sorry you just surprised me Carole. It's been so long. You look stunning," Rachel stammered as she approached Carole with her arms open. Carole pulled Rachel in for a tight embrace and Rachel rested her head on Carole's shoulder.

Rachel had been brought up by her two fabulous Dads and although she had met her birth mother and kept in regular contact with her, Carole had always felt more like a mother. She was just so kind, open and nurturing. Rachel had also felt like she could open up to her with no fear of judgement or rejection. She just embodied love. Rachel breathed in and exhaled slowly to try and stop the tears from forming in her eyes. Carole's familiar scent had brought back lost memories of Rachel being in her house, being a part of the family she had said yes to all those years ago.

Rachel was the first one to break the embrace and stepped back quietly glancing down at the ground while Carole patted her eyes with a tissue that she had produced from her handbag.

"Ladies, as much as I enjoy a good emotional embrace, and I really do. We really need to get going. We have an appointment schedule to adhere to!" Kurt spoke as he flicked his hair with the tips of his fingers.

Rachel nodded and then froze as she heard a girly giggle come from the next room. Daisy. They needed to leave before Carole saw her.

"What was that?" Carole asked smiling at Rachel.

"Nothing," Rachel snapped instantly regretting using that tone with Carole. "Let's go!"

"Sounded like a little girl," Carole murmured staring around the flat.

Rachel could feel herself going red as she stepped forward and turned Carole towards the door. Linking her arm around Carole's, Rachel practically dragged Carole out of the flat and out onto the streets with Kurt in tow. Once they reached the street Rachel could finally relax and enjoy the company of Kurt and Carole. Rachel watched Kurt talk animatedly about the wedding as they strolled down the street towards the first stop on the dress tour. Rachel smiled genuinely at Kurt. It was so nice to see him so happy and excited. Kurt and Blaine were soul mates. They had met each other in high school and Blaine had given Kurt the courage to be strong and himself when he was being bullied. 5 years ago when Kurt had been working at , they had broken up when Blaine admitted to cheating. Kurt had been devastated and it had taken him nearly a year to get past it. When they began to move back towards friends, the chemistry was undeniable and when Blaine was accepted into NYADA, they had got back together. It had been amazing having both Blaine and Kurt at NYADA with her; it was like her own part of the glee family.

"Rachel we are here!" Kurt squealed whilst clapping his hands together gently. Rachel smiled gently at Kurt whilst Carole smiled and squeezed Rachel's arm gently, understanding her apprehension.

Once they were in the store, Rachel had begun to browse through some of the dresses while Kurt could be heard in the distance saying either yes or no.

"I always thought the first time we would be in a bridal shop it would be to pick your wedding dress" Carole spoke sadly.

Rachel froze and after glancing down at the floor for what felt like forever, she whispered, "Me too." Feeling a warm tear fall, Rachel breathed in and continued to look through the rack of dresses as she bit her lip trying to stop herself from sobbing uncontrollably.

"Rachel! You don't need to bother looking – you are not wearing whatever you pick out so get your butt over to the changing room. I have put a few different options in there for you!" Kurt shouted whilst still rummaging through racks of dresses.

Rachel stumbled over to the dressing room without hesitation, partly to get this over and done with and partly to avoid Carole. It was too painful when she spoke to Rachel like she was still her future daughter in law. A look of horror spread across Rachel's face as she spotted the full rack of dresses that was residing in the dressing room. Did Kurt seriously expect her to try on everything single one?

"Yes I do diva!" Kurt spoke through the curtain of the dressing room.

Kurt knew Rachel too well. A genuine smile spread across Rachel's face as she browsed through the rack of dresses, trying to find one that she liked. She pulled out a 50's inspired tea length ruby red dress with a sweet heart neckline. It reminded her of the dress that she had worn to Nationals. She had been so happy and … well Rachel back then. Rachel had moved to New York to attend NYADA and become a star on Broadway but there had always been something missing. Sure it had been amazing sharing New York with Kurt and Santana, they had become her best friends and performing during her time at NYADA had been breathe taking. But something was missing. Rachel unconsciously stroked her bare ring finger with her thumb. He was missing.

5 years Rachel, she told herself. You need to stop. Slipping on the red dress Rachel stared at herself in the mirror. Sure she had dyed her hair and wore more eye makeup now but as she looked in the mirror Rachel felt more like the old moon eyed Rachel Berry for the first time in years. Kurt was going to hate it.

Stepping out of the dressing room fixing the skirt of her dress, Rachel glanced up around her searching for Kurt and Carole. Kurt and Carole were sitting on a couch in the middle of the shop with flutes full with what Rachel assumed was champagne. As both of them seemed to be engrossed in whatever Kurt was showing Carole on his phone, Rachel stepped up to one of the mirrors waiting for Kurt to comment on the dress.

"Aww she is adorable," Carole cooed.

"Yeah, she loves banging on pots and pans when Blaine and I babysit her!" Kurt laughed.

Rachel snapped her head up staring at Kurt and Carole's reflection in the mirror. He couldn't be.

"What is her name? She is so beautiful!" Carole spoke as she bit her lip.

"Daisy, she is 4 and such a mini diva!" Kurt giggled.

Rachel froze. Wide eyed she could only stare in the mirror at Carole cooing over pictures of her daughter. His daughter.

"She really is stunning. She is the double of Rachel! Aww look at her smile," Carole continued to coo. "Her eyes as well."

A slow look of realisation spread across Carole's face. Kurt seemed completely oblivious as Carole seemed to be piecing things together. Suddenly Carole noticed Rachel as their eyes met in the mirror.

She knew. Carole knew.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you for all your follows and reviews - please keep reviewing! **

_**"No matter the distance between us, I am as close to you today as I was yesterday, for as long as you are in my heart, we are never truly far apart." **_

**For Cory.**

**I do not own Glee.**

* * *

All Rachel could do was stare back at Carole. She looked furious, confused and hurt. Later Rachel mouthed to Carole. It was going to be a long day.

The rest of the day of shopping was extensive and Rachel was surprised that Kurt didn't pick up on the tension between her and Carole. Rachel was nervous and was unsure what exactly she was going to tell Carole. She knew that Daisy was his. Rachel didn't know if Carole would tell him. Would he even care? Last time Rachel had heard about him he was still at college studying to be a teacher. He had been busy. With girls. Well one girl in particular. Would he even care what had happened with her after all this time?

Rachel was glad when Kurt had decided that he was going to pick Rachel's dress himself after he hated every dress she had tried on. Rachel looked up biting her lip, glancing at Carole.

"Carole I need to go back to the apartment, email the florists and there is a bespoke wedding register arriving from England that I need to be there for. Take out and a movie?" Kurt asked Carole.

"I'm going to pass sweetheart – I think Rachel and I are going to have a coffee and a catch up!" Carole beamed at Kurt. Rachel's heart sank as she realised the time was getting closer and she still didn't know what to say.

"Oh ok. Well ring me later – are you going back to Lima today or are you staying in town for a few days?" Kurt probed. "I have centre pieces that you could help me with tomorrow!"

Carole smiled sweetly at Kurt as she nodded. Kurt hugged both Rachel and Carole as he turned back towards his apartment. Rachel fidgeted with her hands as she stared at her feet, praying that the ground would swallow her up whole immediately.

"So when exactly were you planning on telling me about Daisy Rachel?" Carole spoke after a few moments of awkward silence, clearly annoyed by her tone. "I mean, I am right in the fact that she is my granddaughter aren't I?"

Rachel's eyes welled up at Carole acknowledging a fact that she had kept hidden for so long. She knew Carole would be the only one to know better.

"Carole can we go and get coffee and I can explain. I promise," Rachel mumbled through tears as she glanced up at Carole.

Carole instantly softened towards Rachel as her motherly instinct took over. "Of course sweetheart."

Rachel started walking towards central park. There was a cart that did an amazing soya latte and it seemed like a better idea to be in the open. Less confined and public. Walking in silence, Rachel wondered how Carole would take the truth. She understood that she would be hurt; Rachel had denied her 4 years of her granddaughter. She wondered if Carole would tell him. As much as she missed him, Rachel did not know if she could have him so close and not hers. They had been two people who had never been just friends. Would it be fair on Daisy to bombard her with strangers? Daisy had never asked Rachel about her father but Rachel knew that it would happen eventually. How could Rachel explain to her that she still loved her father but he was unavailable? That it wasn't that he didn't love her, but he didn't know about her? How could she explain to the light of her life how selfish she had been for all these years?

Rachel sat quietly on one of the benches and fidgeted with her coffee lid. Once Carole had sat beside her in silence, taking in her surroundings, Rachel knew she had to come clean.

"Carole. I don't know where to begin. I mean there is so much to tell you. You are the first person who knows that Daisy is his," Rachel murmured gazing into her cup. "I haven't been able to say his name in four years. Four years! Carole I still love him and not in a creepy obsessive way; it is deeper than that. I still feel tethered to him. I do not feel complete Carole. I've tried to fill the hole with Broadway and New York and I still feel empty. Daisy has filled the void a little bit but I still feel like half of me is missing. I am sick of being this poor man's version of myself."

Rachel had started to sob uncontrollably and all Carole could do was rub her hand up and down Rachel's back. She had known that Rachel had cared about her son that much had been obvious by the teenage engagement. But the feelings that Rachel was talking about Carole had only experienced it once. Her first husband. Carole was completely in love with Burt and she had a great life with him but with Christopher it had been like breathing. He had been part of her in a raw, passionate and powerful way that she could never explain to someone who had never experienced it. A wave of emotion overcame Carole. She had always liked Rachel but in this moment a wave of unconditional love overwhelmed Carole and she wrapped her nurturing arms around the sobbing small brunette.

"Rachel there are only a few things I know unconditionally. Firstly, I will always love my son and place his happiness above my own. Secondly, my husband is amazing and I am truly blessed to have found him. Finally, I believe that you can truly have more than one intense loves in a lifetime but there is always that one true ultimate love that you can never deny. It is pure, intense and passionate. It strikes you when you least expect it and you fall in love even before you realize that you have and no matter how much distance, time or obstacles there is put between you, your love will always be bigger than it." Carole whispered to Rachel, burning tears falling from her red and puffy eyes.

After twenty minutes of embracing and tears, Carole and Rachel broke apart and they both dabbed their faces with tissues.

"In the last five years I have never spoken what I had been feeling out loud Carole. Thank you," Rachel smiled at Carole as Carole gazed adoringly back at her. "I knew you would be the only one to call me out."

"Daisy has my son's eyes and my son has his father's eyes. I would know them anywhere," Carole spoke softly.

Rachel did not know how to respond to Carole so simply nodded. Carole sensing Rachel's awkwardness turned towards Rachel and asked "So how did Daisy happen? Ok ok I know the process of how she happened but you were both broken up and not speaking the last I heard?"

A grin spread Rachel's face. "Yeah we were not talking but then he called me out of the blue to help him for Mr Schuster's wedding. Singing with him again after everything that had been said and done felt like returning home. We all know how much music chemistry we have and one thing led to another. I got too scared the next morning to stay and talk about it with him so I left before he woke. A month passed without contact between us and I did a home pregnancy test and that was positive. I went to the doctors and they told me that it was a false positive and that I wasn't pregnant. Two months later I was still had nausea, gaining weight and craving meat! I went back to the doctors and was told that I was indeed pregnant. Of course I was shocked and then I realised that it could be one of two possible fathers as I was seeing Brody at the time of conception. I tried to speak to Brody and he was too busy to talk. I had only spoken to F... your son once or twice since the wedding. It felt like it always had. It felt like we were moving back towards each other. I went to surprise him by visiting him at campus. I had taken an early morning flight because I always travel better in the morning and when I got to his corridor his door opened and a girl exited. At first I thought it had been one of Puck's conquests but then Finn came to the door and kissed the girl. Not just a quick kiss but a passionate long kiss. I could hear him calling her his girlfriend and smiling at her with that beautiful half smile that made me melt. I had to leave before they knew I was there and I fell to pieces in front of them. I couldn't bring myself to not let him be happy but I just couldn't be there for to witness it. I could not be there to witness him loving someone else. I stopped answering any texts, phone calls and emails. It was too painful imaging her in his arms where I belonged," Rachel answered fidgeting with her damp tissue. "I have been extremely selfish keeping Daisy from him and you but I don't think my heart could bare having him in my life and him belonging to someone else."

Carole briefly glanced at her hands before staring sympathically back at Rachel. "I understand I really do Rachel, but you love your daughter too much to deny her that. You will always put her happiness above your own. You love her that much," Carole stated.

Rachel knew Carole was right. She needed to tell him.

"I will talk to him at the wedding. Daisy deserves to know him," Rachel spoke slowly as she breathed out. She would need all her strength to get her through that day. And a sexy dress. Shaking her head to rid herself of her thoughts Rachel spoke "I think that it needs to be a gradual process though. I will not bombard my daughter emotionally; she will get to know you all gradually. Also everyone assumes that Daisy is Brody's, so I need to speak to your son before we throw labels like father and grandmother around."

Carole nodded, a genuine smile spreading across her face, "Of course Rachel."

"Then would you like to go and meet your granddaughter?" Rachel asked.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks for the reviews, follows and favourites! Keep on reviewing! **

**"Sometimes things become possible if we want them bad enough." **  
**- T S Elliot**

**I do not own Glee **

**For Cory**

* * *

Rachel strolled back towards her apartment, a genuine smile plastered across her face. It had felt so good to finally talk to someone about everything that she had been feeling in the last few years. Kurt and Santana had heard bits and pieces but they hadn't known why Rachel did not want to talk to him anymore. They had argued with her to try and encourage her to change her mind but Rachel had been stubborn and so embarrassed. She had believed him when he had told her that they were endgame. It had struck a chord with her. He could always see through all her insecurities and crazy, even when she had convinced herself otherwise. He had known she didn't love Brody. He had known that she was still in love with him. He had known her even when she didn't. That was the reason that it had hurt so much when she had seen him with her. They were supposed to be endgame. Rachel had finally been ready to open herself up to the possibly of a future together again and he had a girlfriend. It had made Rachel question everything she had held dear. He had been a vital part of the foundation on which she had built her inner strength, self-belief and confidence. He had made her question it all and it had all came crumbling down. The Rachel Berry pre Glee club would have never let a man define her. She would never have allowed herself to be an understudy to anyone for five years. She would have trodden on the woman wandering home calling herself Rachel Berry. Rachel couldn't blame everything on him. She had chosen to play the victim but Carole had been right. She needed to talk to him. Her daughter deserved to know her father, to have him in her life no matter how painful it was. Her own heartache would be the price for her daughter's happiness and it was a price she was willing to pay.

Staring at the front door to her apartment building Rachel took a deep breathe. Carole had agreed to come over for dinner to meet Daisy. Rachel had insisted that Carole was introduced as a friend until she spoke to him. She needed to make sure he was on board before she introduced Daisy to the Hummel-Hudson clan. She also needed to speak to Santana and Kurt. They had both assumed that Daisy had been Brody's as Rachel had never told them about sleeping with him at the wedding. Rachel bit her lip as she knew that they were both going to be extremely upset and angry with her. She had never realised the full extent of how many people she had been effectively lying to all these years.

Rachel opened the door still deep in thought as she heard a familiar voice singing along to the radio in the kitchen. Rachel threw her keys and bag on the side table as she walked towards the kitchen. Leaning against the doorframe silently so not to disturb them, Rachel took in the sight of her daughter in a pink miniature apron singing along to the radio softly as she was mixing a bowl of chocolate and cornflakes. Santana was stood beside her smiling down and brushing Daisy's hair out of her eyes as she sang along with the radio and Daisy. Rachel could not help but grin at both Daisy and Santana as Daisy finished mixing and showed Santana her chocolate covered palms. Santana gently lifted the tiny girl off her stool as she began to run the kitchen sink tap for her to wash her hands under.

Once Daisy's hands were washed and dried, Rachel heard Daisy gently mutter, "Sanana, why do I not have daddy? All the other girls have both a mummy and a daddy. Mummy looks so sad. Did daddy not want us?"

Santana's expression soften as she hesitated before looking down at Daisy and replying, "Sometimes people only have a mommy or a daddy because that person has double the love for their children. A family is not just who you are related to by blood, but by who you choose to have around you. We are a family, not by blood but because we love each other very much and we choose to be in each other's lives."

Daisy fidgeted with her hands before nodding and gazing up at Santana, "I just wish sometimes I had a daddy so mummy wouldn't be so sad Sanana."

"I know Lady Dee Dee," Santana replied quietly.

Rachel's heart broke hearing her daughter wish her happiness. Did she really seem that miserable? That heartbroken?

Rachel stepped into the kitchen after a few moments had pasted and said, "Hey guys did you have fun?"

Daisy threw herself towards her mother giggling happily. "We made chocolate flake cakes Mommy," Daisy squealed with excitement pointing at the tray of paper cases that Santana was spooning chocolate covered cornflakes into.

"They look amazing baby girl. Do you want to get cleaned up and change for dinner? We are having a guest over," Rachel stated as Santana raised an eyebrow towards Rachel.

"Who?" Daisy shrieked unable to contain her excitement.

"A friend of mommy's called Carole," Rachel stated as Rachel met Santana confused glare.

"I best get ready then!" Daisy screeched as she pushed herself away from Rachel and towards her room.

"Why is man boob's mom coming for dinner?" Santana asked.

Rachel could sense that Santana was suspicious and she needed to come clean and quickly before Santana found out for herself. No time like the present Rachel thought to herself.

"Santana I need to tell you something. Please don't be mad but at Mr Sche's wedding after I sang the duet with F…him, I kind of slept with him," Rachel spoke slowly.

A look of realisation came over Santana as her mouth formed an o before her face became a mask of anger. "You mean to tell me that Daisy is Franketeen's daughter? The one person who does not know about her because you insisted that he wasn't allowed to know? Man hands, this is Rachel Berry circa 2010 crap, being unbelievably selfish and petty to make you feel better about yourself. How could you not tell him about his own fricking daughter? He may be freakishly tall and have weird puffy pyramid nipples but he has every right to know his own flesh and blood! I cannot believe you!" Santana hissed.

"Santana don't you think I know that? Can you not see how torn up I am about this? How miserable I have been for years? How messed up and pathetic I have been? I am trying to make it right. I am done playing the victim and I am ready to tell him about Daisy. She deserves to know him," Rachel spat back at Santana, her eyes threatening to betray her new found strength.

"Four years though Rachel! It was plain annoying when you pulled this crap in high school but you stopping your daughter from knowing her father is malicious. Denying her part of her family and identity is easily the most self-centred and narcissistic thing that you have ever done. All your daughter wants is for you to be happy. So much so that she is convinced that she is not enough for you. You do not deserve her," Santana spat violently at Rachel.

Rachel gripped the kitchen breakfast bar and closed her eyes. Did Daisy really not think she was enough for Rachel? Had she been that petty that she made her daughter feel inadequate? Scorching hot tears feel silently down Rachel's face as she tightly held on to the breakfast bar. Santana glared at Rachel wondering if they were crocodile tears after all Rachel could cry on demand. After a few minutes of watching Rachel sob silently, Santana decided that these tears were real and pulled Rachel in for a hug once she closed the gap between them.

"Rachel I'm sorry that I shouted but you cannot exclude him from her life because he is an idiot, that decision is bigger than you," Santana spoke as she tried to reassure Rachel.

Breathing in, Rachel broke away from the embrace and glanced up at Santana wanting her to know how truly sorry she was for lying. "I know. I'm going to tell him at the wedding. I need to be a better and stronger woman for my daughter and that begins with me being honest about my mistakes. That is why Carole is coming over, to begin to build bridges," Rachel stated as she put her hands on Santana's arms. "I am so sorry for not telling you the truth. I was embarrassed and misguided and not for the first time. You are my family and I should have been honest from the beginning."

A weak smile spread across Santana's face as she wiped away the tears from Rachel's cheek. "Ok. I just got so angry; we both know what it is like to feel like you are not wanted by your family. I didn't want that for Daisy because she is all kinds of awesome," Santana uttered.

Rachel nodded. Santana's maternal grandmother had cut her out of her life when Santana had come out as a lesbian and Santana had been so hurt by her not accepting a fundamental part of her.

Rachel heard the door bell and an excited 4 year old girl screaming "I'm coming!" as she ran to the door. Rachel wandered nervously into the hallway to help open the door and begin building bridges.


	6. Chapter 6

**Apologies for taking so long to update! Been a crazy few weeks. Hope you like the chapter and review :) **

**'Everyday I tell myself I need to get over you, but every night I find myself thinking about how much I want you back.'**

**I do not own Glee. **

**For Cory. **

* * *

The next couple of weeks pasted quickly and the wedding was getting closer and closer. Rachel did not know how she was going to tell him. She couldn't just come out with it. "Yeah erm so remember when we hooked up after the wedding? Yeah I got pregnant and never told you." Rachel was not sure if he would freak out or just be extremely angry. Probably both. Kurt had been a mixture of hurt and angry but he had ultimately understood. He had just been happy to find out that he was actually an uncle and had decided to add Daisy as flower girl at the last minute. Daisy was excited to attend the wedding and visit her granddads as she had never been to Lima before. Daisy had also grown very fond of Carole. She had visited as much as possible and Daisy could not get enough of playing afternoon tea with her. Rachel still had not told Daisy who Carole really was but seeing them play together and Carole smile up at Rachel made her feel like family again. It felt so good.

Today was the day that they were leaving for Lima as the wedding was in 3 days and there was still so much to do. Rachel had still not seen her bridesmaid's dress. Kurt had purchased it after he found out about Daisy and had decided that Rachel had to look stunning to make his brother speechless and as such Rachel was not allowed to see it until the wedding day. Rachel trusted Kurt but she could not help feeling a bit apprehensive. Would he really think of her like that after all this time?

Zipping up her suitcase, Rachel glanced around her bedroom and let her eyes rest on the dresser under her mirror. Framed photographs of her parents, friends and Daisy littered the top of the oak dresser. Smiling as she glanced at all of them she reached to the back and picked up a photo in a simple silver leaf frame. It was a photograph of New Directions at Nationals in Chicago – the year they had won. Rachel smiled weakly at the 18 year old Rachel Berry beaming back at her. He was stood beside her beaming at the camera with the same half smirk that she could not resist. Rachel turned the frame over and gently opened up the back to reveal a photograph that she stared at when she was really lonely. It had been taken at Mr Schester's wedding by one of her friends during their duet. The way he was gazing at her in the photograph, with a look of pure love, and the way her younger self was gazing and grinning up at him made Rachel smile. One day she would be able to show the photo to Daisy and explain that she was made in love. A moment of pure tenderness when two halves of a soul connected. Running her thumb over his face Rachel bit her lip. Telling him was going to be the hardest thing she had ever done. Worse than childbirth!

Rachel pressed the photograph to her chest briefly before placing it back in the frame and replacing the photo frame at the back of the dresser. Building bridges Rachel told herself as she wheeled her luggage from her bedroom towards the front door.

"Daisy you ready to go see your Granddads?" Rachel asked loudly as she heard Daisy squealing in the next room.

* * *

Strolling through arrivals with Daisy, Rachel griped onto Daisy's hand harder as she pushed through people to get to her Dads. Hiram and Leroy were standing talking animatedly until they saw Rachel.

"Granddad!" Daisy squealed as she tore her hand out of Rachel's and belted towards her dads.

Leroy threw his arms open and caught Daisy before picking her up and twirling her around. Hiram was always the more subtle one and he greeted his granddaughter with a smile and a kiss. It was hard to imagine that they had been so unsupportive when they first found out about Daisy. Rachel had purposely not told them she was pregnant until one day they had surprised her by turning up in New York. It had been hard to deny she was 8 months pregnant and they had found it tough to accept that their little girl was no longer a little girl. They had a few heated and long discussions with some dramatic walk outs but Rachel expected no less from a Berry family discussion. All the bad feelings had been put aside as soon as Hiram and Leroy had held Daisy. She was their granddaughter and she had had them under her spell since her first breath.

"Hey guys I am here too!" Rachel teased as she smiled at her Dads.

"Sorry sweetie, how was your flight?" Hiram asked as he embraced his daughter.

"It was ok. Daisy had never flown before so I was more worried about her but I was more of a nervous wreck then she was." Rachel replied as she stepped back out of the embrace with her dad. She glanced over at her daddy who was dancing and singing with Daisy. "They are both as bad as each other."

"I remember when not so long ago that was you," Hiram smirked.

"Seems like only yesterday! Right I need to go grab our suitcase, will you watch over those two?" Rachel asked as Hiram simply nodded as he watched Daisy twirling.

Rachel set off towards the screen that she had noted on her way through arrivals that told her which baggage reclaim belt her luggage would come through. Since it was Lima, there were only four possible belts. Rachel walked slowly towards the crowd surrounding the belt that her luggage would appear on, Rachel took out her phone to check if there were messages while she waited.

Seeing that there were three messages, Rachel opened them to see they were from Kurt, Santana and Carole.

'Diva – dinner tonight, breadsticks and try not to dress like an oversized toddler. Actually I will come to you to make sure – Kurt'

Seriously Kurt I can dress myself Rachel thought as she replied to Carole's message saying that they had arrived in Lima. Santana's message had just been Santana complaining about being in Lima. Both Santana and Kurt had flown back to Lima two days ago. Kurt had wanted to make sure everything was going to plan and Santana had wanted to spend time with her mom. Although Santana would never have admitted it to Rachel, her mom was her rock. She had supported Santana through everything and had been the driving force behind Santana moving to New York.

The belt started moving and Rachel just prayed that her luggage would be one of the first on the belt. She wanted to spend as much time as possible with her Dads before she was swept up in the craziness that was Kurt's wedding. Staring blankly at the belt, Rachel knew she would know her luggage the moment she saw it, it was a royal blue colour with gold stars on it. Rachel had gone through a phase during high school of putting gold stars everywhere and had grown out of it as she had gotten older but when she had spotted the luggage in the mall she couldn't help but purchase it. After all gold stars were still her thing.

Rachel couldn't help but feel like she was being stared at. In New York everyone was so busy with their own thing that you would dance practically naked in the streets and no one would even glance in your direction. Keeping her eye on the conveyor belt to try and shake the feeling, Rachel finally spotted her luggage. Waiting until it came around to her, Rachel put all her weight into dragging it off the conveyor belt, nearly falling backwards as it came off the belt. Fixing her dress and hair quickly Rachel glanced up at the other side of the belt.

A handsome young man wearing dark blue jeans and a shirt over a t-shirt which clung to his toned and muscular chest and biceps caught Rachel's eye. Rachel stared as she suddenly recognised his face. The man took his suitcase off the convoyer belt with ease and as if he sensed being stared at, he glanced up in Rachel's direction. The colour drained from Rachel's face as she stared in the face that she had only dreamt of seeing in the last few years. Into the eyes of the person she had tried so desperately to forget. Into her daughter's eyes.

Him.


	7. Chapter 7

**I firstly wanted to say that I hope everyone is enjoying this story as much as I am writing it. ****Please continue to review!  
**

**The tribute episode was beautiful and although I sobbed through it all, you could really feel the love for Cory from all of this famiglee. And well Lea...there were no words. **

**I do not own Glee**

**"Enjoy life, it is not a round trip". **

**For Cory**

* * *

The only sound was an angelic voice. It was soft yet strong. He instantly recognised it. He could listen to that voice for an eternity. It was the kind of sound that resonates and fuses with your soul. He knew it belonged to her. It had always been her. Reaching out all he could feel was warmth radiating on his skin. She was like the sun. A star. The warmth began to fully embrace him and for the first time in what seemed like forever, he felt alive. Like his world had been grey scale without him noticing and suddenly his world had burst in colour. Vitality had been breathed inside of him and was pouring into all of his senses, awakening every nerve ending in his body. He was home.

As quickly as it had come, the warmth diffused out of him leaving the familiar grey tones. His world had never felt so cold and barren. Emotion filled him as he wept for the warmth to return to him. To fill the void left inside of him. But he knew it wouldn't. He was too broken.

Finn opened his eyes to see the burning sun peering through a slit in his curtains. It had happened again. He had dreamt about her. A tear rolled down his cheek silently as he tried desperately to calm himself down. He often dreamt of her but more frequently he would just dream of feeling her presence. He was scared that he was beginning to forget her face. Her smile. Her eyes. He didn't know if what he now heard, saw and felt in his dreams was her or his warped memory of her. He clung to his memories tightly, so afraid that he would forget her.

Sighing Finn turned and sat up in his bed. Glancing down at the clock he noticed that it was 4am and he had only slept for four hours. Today was going to be a hard day.

Pushing himself out of bed Finn grabbed a t-shirt from a drawer and wandered into the kitchen. He needed coffee. It was an acquired taste Finn had learnt. With enough sugar and milk it wasn't that bad. It helped him get through the days when he had dreamt about her. Finn had been dreaming about her since she had stopped taking his calls nearly five years ago. Sometimes they were blurred brief memories but sometimes they were so vivid that he could smell her. Her hair had always smelt like strawberries.

Sipping at the cup of coffee Finn was alerted to someone watching him. He merely ignored the intrusion knowing that if she had something to say she would let him know. A woman in her mid-twenties crept up behind of Finn and wrapped her arms around his waist, placing her forehead on his back.

"You ok baby?" she asked quietly.

Finn didn't want to lie to her but found himself sprouting a story about being nervous for seeing his high school friends again. He had barely spoken to any of them since they had started college with the exception of Puck and Kurt so it was a reason for being nervous but not THE reason.

The girl nodded and removed her arms from Finn's waist. Smiling weakly she walked towards the door before stopping and staring at Finn. "She is going to be there isn't she?" questioned the girl.

Finn simply glanced at his feet. She already knew the answer and she was seeking reassurance from Finn but he couldn't bring himself to tell her anymore lies even to comfort her.

The girl did not respond and closed the door behind her as she returned to their bedroom.

Finn sat down at the breakfast bench and put his face in his hands trying to figure out how he had gotten here. After Mr Shuster's wedding he had been sure that they would drift back towards each other but she had seen more and more distant and distracted until she had just stopped taking his calls and replying to his texts. Finn couldn't help but feel empty. He felt that life was happening around him and he was just going with the tide. He had tried to talk to Kurt about her but Kurt refused to talk about it and when he had visited she had been nowhere to be seen. It was then that Finn had decided that he needed to surrender and stop putting his life on hold. He had been hanging out with this girl Tiffany from one of the parties he had attended during freshman year at college. She was beautiful in an obviously attractive way, curvy in all the right places and blonde. She reminded him of his ex-girlfriend Quinn. Tiffany decided that they should go public and for the last five years Finn had been going with it. Tiffany had decided to move to New York after college and Finn had followed her there. She had known why he had really moved to New York. Her. It was her favourite city. However Tiffany had chosen to ignore it. Finn didn't even remember why he was with Tiffany. Sure she was cool and fun but she didn't ignite him. Finn loved her but was not in love with her.

Sighing, Finn pushed himself up from the breakfast bar and stared out of the window into the streets. The sky was washed with tones of pink and orange. Finn couldn't help but wonder if Rachel was awake and watching the same New York sunrise. He had managed to avoid her and he was pretty sure she didn't know that he was here in New York. Probably because Kurt hadn't found out yet. Finn didn't know how as his mom had visited him a lot in the last month or two to make sure he was settling in. It was probably for the best, it would mean that he had gotten out of doing wedding stuff. To be honest his relationship with Kurt had been strained in the last few years. Kurt had been trying so hard to not talk about Rachel around him than it made him feel uncomfortable and they had started to drift apart. Most of their conversations were about their parents or Kurt's wedding.

Rubbing the back of his neck today was the day. The day he went back to Lima for Kurt's wedding. He would see her. Finn was secretly grateful that Tiffany had been unable to go due to work constraints. He didn't want her about when he saw her for first time in five years. How bad is that, Finn asked himself? He did not want his girlfriend around so he could spend some time with his ex? But Tiffany was no Rachel. Rachel had been pure and compassionate. Tiffany was neither.

Glancing at his watch Finn realised that he had been pondering about Rachel for 2 hours and needed to leave for the airport in 20 minutes. Rushing into the bedroom Finn threw on some clothes noting that Tiffany was fast asleep. Did he wake her? Could he face more questions from her? No. Finn decided that writing a quick note would be better.

After finishing the note, Finn grabbed his suitcase and jacket and ran out of the flat to hail a cab to the airport.

After checking in Finn made his way through security and once through discovered the plane was boarding. Finn was grateful as he didn't have to waste time sitting about in the departure lounge and he soon found himself sat next a young couple. Finn groaned inwardly and put on his headphones on to drown the constant conversation of 'I love you' and 'no I love you more'. He needed to figure out what he wanted to say to Rachel. He had never understood why she stopped talking his calls. He needed a reason if nothing else so he could get some closure. But did he really want closure? There was a part of him that wanted nothing more than to wrap the petite brunette in his arms again. Finn decided he should sleep on it and closed his eyes. As his tiredness overcame him and he started to dream.

All he could see were a pair of eyes. A warm chocolate pair of eyes framed with dark long lashes. Suddenly the eyes were framed by long chocolate brown hair. It was her. He wrapped himself in the chestnut locks as the smell of strawberries surrounded him.

Finn woke up with his head hitting the side of the plane. What the Finn thought. Sleepily peeking out of the window he could see that they had landed in Lima. Finn stretched and rubbed his eyes as he waited to disembark from the plane. When he was his turn to leave the plane he had to bend down until he left the plane, straining his neck. The joys of being over six foot Finn told himself.

Making his way to the baggage reclaim he quickly texted his mother to let her know he had landed. Glancing up from his spot a woman caught his eye. She had brunette hair that cascaded down her back that had blonde highlights around the ends. She had delicate features with a larger nose. Like her nose. Cold sweats took over Finn as he realised that this woman was Rachel. The woman he had been dreaming and pining over for the last five years was about 40 feet away from him. Finn took a deep breathe to try and calm himself but just when he thought he was in control, her eyes looked up and met his.

Rachel had always been beautiful but the woman that stood staring back at him was stunning. Her body was more womanly but still petite and her make up only enhanced her beautiful face. Finn wanted to run and enclosed her in his arms but all he could do was gawk awkwardly at her in shock until she broke eye contact and rushed away dragging a suitcase.

All Finn could do was stare after her. It was like he was 18 again watching as she walked away from him onto a train. His eyes swelled with tears as he stared at his feet. He really had been an idiot back then. Grabbing his duffel bag off the baggage reclaim belt, Finn headed to the exit and looked around to catch another glimpse of her. Sighing when he couldn't see her, he joined the queue for a taxi. All of his old feeling had come bursting out the moment he had laid his eyes on her.

It was going to be a long couple of days being back in Lima.


End file.
